a whole new world (trill, trill, trill)

Right in my own backyard practically. A whole universe of trails awaits me at a particular location that I formerly thought was simply a minor matrix. Well, not in those exact words. But really, this Sunday I had an hour to burn and trail shoes in the car with me, so I went on a seemingly sparse section of trail, and to my surprise, found a small path that led clear up the mountain! After about 20 minutes of climbing, there I was, up at the top of the mountain, with trails that branched out in at least two very promising directions. Wonderful! Not to mention the fact that the goddess of spring was alive and well in these hills - those purple flowering shrubs blooming all over, the thick bright green grass, and the towering blackened sticks of yuccas already bloomed and gone.
today was the first day of spring, and, as my yoga teacher was very excited about, we were all in shavasana at the exact moment that this shift occurred. She was nearly in convulsions with excitement. I have decided that it would be healthy for me to not allow feelings of disappointment about the way I think things should work out to take root, but instead to trust that Everything Is Exactly As It ShoulD BE INCLUDING MY NOW JAMMED SHIFT KEY DO NOT EAT AT YOUR COMPUTER EVEN IF YOU FEEL IT IS NEW AND INVINCIBLE AND SHOULD NOT BE DOING THIS FOR AT LEAST A FEW MORE MONTHS PERHAPS TURNING IT OFF AND THEN BACK ON WILL CURE IT

back in the game

Once again, along comes the prospect of another date, this time in the form of my local grocer. Yes friends, I was asked out by a checker in a health food store. The man is now in possession of my phone number, which he very suavely pulled out his cell phone to accept.

Now of course we know that this episode was not without the peculiar horrifying humor that my dating life seems so prone to. Why did she ask him how come he does not have his mother's phone number programed into his phone? Why did she say "I don't know" when he asked her if he could get her number? Why did she try to make a joke and say that the elderly woman next in line left and went to the next line because she was afraid that he was going to ask for her number too? It's hard work staying single, folks. I don't just invent this stuff on the spur of the moment. Coming across this green takes practice, you know. Years of refinement.

I think I'm ready for another bad date though. I don't think this is going anywhere because the whole night after this unsettling proposal I felt like my shoulders were closing in around my heart. (Hmmm.) Nevertheless, if he somehow overlooks my lack of social coherence and calls me, I think that going out on a date with him would be a good thing for me. Some variety. And possibly a very entertaining blog! I don't know a single thing about him, outside of several key factors:
1. He does not live at home (I don't really care)
2. He thinks that working at the grocery store is monotonous.
3. He has a second job as a bouncer (I'm a nice girl!)
4. His mother used to make him beets (finding out this fact was what lead to the whole "why isn't your mother in your cell phone" question.....nevermind.)
5. He kind of looks at me with ga-ga eyes, which, I have to say, frightens me. Too strong, fella!

HappilY, his asking me out proves to me that all men are not absolutely horrified by all the lovely veggies I take home with me (so happily!). Seriously, this is a big issue for me, and for most of the men of my acquiantance.

Aside from all this theoretical nonesence, there is a guy who I am pretty sure should ask me out, but I don't think that he knows it yet. I think he misses my subtle eye flirtations and the blood that sometimes rushes to my face quite uninvitedly.

an old, ignored longing

I'm feeling torn. I love my life right now - seriously, there is so much perfection in it, so many elements that I love. but, hearing about a former neighbor, who is two years younger than me and who has successfully carved a niche for herself in Telluride, CO, suddenly stirred up some discontentment in my soul. So, once again, I feel very compelled to plan an outdoor adventure for myself.

I bounce in between the poles of home and traveling. I have so much family in the area. I have children who are deeply attached to me. I have a great job, excellent professors, trails right behind my house. Lots of friends I love deeply. But part of me wants to have the freedom to roam about. I want to have a new setting. i need more adventure than my recent feelings of being stalked by mountain lions when i hike solo.

and so, i think i will get seroius about planning this trip i've been talking about taking - a grand tour of the North - the grand tetons, zion, the olympic penninsula, and lots in between. sounds ambitious huh? i'm definitely going to have to see about recruiting some friends. june anyone? maybe three weeks? i better get going on it. hmmm. either that or i will do something wild like join toastmasters. very tricky.